to all my pipe smoking rabbits

i have decided there are other things in the world to worry about than the morality of humor.


for example, what i am going to do after college? that is a great question. and more important.


who likes bunnies? do you? well, we can pretend like you do. cause i have a story to tell, but i'm still learning how to deliver stories so they are entertaining.

okay, i lived in iowa growing up. lots of wild forest creatures. like squirrels and bunnies and sparrows. ferocious squirrels bunnies and sparrows. vengeful and spiteful and hateful and full of death and destruction squirrels bunnies and sparrows.

so it was spring time. and all the bunnies had little baby bunnies. well, one day it was our chore to sweep out the garage because we were annoying my parents. well, my mom came out to help us out cause i think she felt sorry for us. and this baby bunny wanted to get in the garage. well, my mom isn't going to have any of this. she grabs a broom, and chases the bunny around the garage, but if you know anything about ferocious bunnies, they are QUICK. finally, my mom finally cornered the bunny, and gave it a swat out of the garage. and this cute, baby bunny gave the most human cry i have ever heard from an animal that isn't my brother.

it scarred my sister for several months.

btw, i used to mow the lawn, and there was a bunny hole with bunnies. i killed the bunnies.


BUNNIES!!!

5 things that bunnies are good for:

1. getting swatted by my mom's broom
2. getting mowed over
3. getting hit by a car
4. getting eaten by an eagle
5. getting 5lbs of meat on the Oregon Trail